Chapter 244

There's a saying: "Make haste slowly." Basically, it's a way of packaging the truth of "don't cut corners" with an analogy so even idiots can understand it. Maybe they say it to smart people too, I guess. But hold on—if you're actually smart, you wouldn't end up in a situation where you need to hurry in the first place. So, really, it's aimed at idiots after all.

And I am no idiot. Sure, I do some reckless stuff, but at least I don't go picking flashy fights with no-life clans, and it's not like I can't spawn Uniques myself. And if someone griefs me, I definitely don't go all-in on PK retaliation either… I think? I'm pretty sure. Anyway, I'm not an idiot. Which means "make haste slowly" does not apply to me. Flawless logic, if I do say so myself.

So—

Sunraku: "Comin' through—!!"

Running late as hell, I tear across the rooftops. No time to use the front door. I smash straight through a grimy, opaque window and crash into the Black Wolf Hall—the designated meeting spot and the base of the Schwarz Vulf clan in Fifticia.

Sunraku: "Phew… safe."

Pencilgon: "…………? ………!?"

Sunraku: "Yo, Pencilgon. What's with the stupid look?"

Pencilgon: "...An exhibitionist?"

How rude. Female characters get a slight AGI modifier, so I specifically used a grail to get here, you know. Sure, I was running experiments in Rabituza and took all my gear off, so I'm basically in my underwear. Hahaha, I gotta laugh—I look like a starter character. Ugh, my chest hurts from all the bouncing!

The clock rewinds just a little.

Oikatzo: "Honestly, I'm kinda jealous you can put on a face like you're just heading out for new desserts at times like this."

Pencilgon: "Well, it's not like we're going to throw down or anything."

Kyo the Ultimate: "Then is it really okay to drag me along, an active red-name?"

Pencilgon: "We've got about three topics for today's little chat, and you are an important witness for one of them."

The Black Wolf Hall—a base Schwarz Vulf built after a massive mob-slaughtering spree. For the Wolfgang clan, stepping in here is basically diving into the enemy's stomach. That said, including the new recruit Kyo the Ultimate, this bunch all has at least one or two screws loose. Pencilgon licks her lips, ready to go full throttle on the silver-tongued persuasion. Oikatzo casually double-checks his gear. And Kyo the Ultimate is openly stroking the hilt of the katana at her hip, like she's practically hoping some kind of trouble breaks out.

That being said, Wolfgang is supposed to send four members today. The original three from when the alliance was formed, plus Kyo the Ultimate as the "party involved" in a certain incident… or so it should be.

Oikatzo: "That guy's not coming."

Pencilgon: "Hmm… I doubt he'd just blow us off, but it could be real-life stuff."

Kyo the Ultimate: "If something came up in real life, wouldn't he at least send an email?"

Pencilgon: "Which means we can't rule out the possibility that he's asleep."

Kyo the Ultimate: "This calls for severe punishment."

Oikatzo: "You two turned that into a two-against-one real naturally, huh."

As if it were the most normal thing in the world, the two of them start plotting sanctions against the absent fourth member, drawing a wry smile from Kyogoku. The moment they entered the Black Wolf Hall, several players—whose gear looks oddly shabby for some reason—started glaring daggers at Kyo the Ultimate, like they want to shoot her dead on the spot. The girl herself just wiggles the beast ears no human should have and waves back cheerfully.

Kyo the Ultimate: "Look, Pencilgon. Seeing eyes like those makes me glad I became a PKer."

Pencilgon: "I won't deny it, but you do realize you're saying something pretty messed up, right?"

Tossing out a casual response to Kyo the Ultimate’s comment—she's committed to staying a red-name, actively courting the hatred of other players—Pencilgon glances to the side.

(Well, even if the clan's policy shifts to hardline tactics, it'd be straight-up brainwashing if every moderate fell in line together.)

Unlike the players Kyogoku has PKed, these players look at Pencilgon and the others with troubled, almost apologetic eyes. They're not just moderates—they're players who put more weight on online gaming etiquette.

(Momo-chan's so soft on stuff like this, which makes her adorable…)

The simple fact that the clan hasn't unified its internal stance means they're already not at full strength. You could even say Schwarz Vulf has already fractured into three factions. Originally split between moderates and hardliners, the hardliners have since divided further into the "just let us punch Wolfgang directly" faction and the "we just want their intel" faction.

That split is an irregularity caused by Kyo the Ultimate’s unexpected PK spree, but not all irregularities are harmful.

(All right… where should I start poking? Having this many cards in hand is just way too fun.)

Psyger-100: "…You look like you're enjoying yourself quite a bit, Arthur Pencilgon."

Pencilgon: "Hehe… do I really look that way, Psyger-100-chan? You did… take good care of me back then, after all…"

Resting her elbows on the table and fixing her gaze on the visitors, Psyger-100's expression is stiff. Even at the mention of the Ashura Kai collapse—a topic Pencilgon personally pulled the trigger on—she doesn't so much as twitch an eyebrow.

At this, Oikatzo quietly averts his eyes. Kyo the Ultimate’s eyes light up. And Pencilgon, still smiling, heaves a mental sigh.

(Honestly… you just pile everything onto the platter without thinking ahead, and that's exactly why things get this messy.)

Pencilgon isn't the only one who has to take the reins of this meeting, tangled up as it is in conflicting agendas. Naturally, Psyger-100, as the head of Schwarz Vulf, has to show up here carrying the weight of clan members swirling with every emotion imaginable.

Psyger-100: "Seems you're one short."

Pencilgon: "That's our line too. For now, our little bullet… hehe, for all we know, he might be off discovering yet another new Unique…"

Bullseye. Of course, no one else here has any way of knowing that the half-naked topic of conversation really did just reach the seventh Unique. The overt provocation makes the glares from the Schwarz Vulf players boring into the Wolfgang members grow even sharper.

Psyger-100: "I see… So even you can't keep that player on a leash."

Pencilgon: "Well, he is a bullet. What good does tying a rope to gunfire do?"

A jab at her inability to control a piece that moves on its own, and a reply that parries it gracefully. In an atmosphere that feels ready to explode at any moment, the three Wolfgang members take their seats—

Sunraku: "Comin' through—!!"

And then, smashing through the second-floor window of the open atrium inside the Black Wolf Hall, a half-naked woman in her underwear comes crashing down into the building.

Sunraku: "Hey, Pencilgon. Don't you think you've been laughing a bit too much?"

Pencilgon: "No… I mean, come on… hehehe, who'd have thought… hehehehe, you'd come back ball-less after just one day… pfft-haha…"

Don't call me ball-less. This is a product of the octopus's miracles, okay? Though honestly, the size of these boobs gets in the way so much it's kind of a problem.

Oikatzo: "You can change gender in this game?"

Sunraku: "Not an option for you, Mr. Can't-Spawn-a-Unique."

Oikatzo: "Okay, so it's Unique-related. Leaving that aside—I'm punching you."

Sunraku: "Ooh, so scaaary. The jealousy of a guy who can't spawn Uniques is so scaaary."

Oikatzo: "The fact that even your voice is female now just makes it more annoying…!"

Man, teasing someone who can't spawn Uniques is fun! Voice and all, I've got a full gender flip, so I'm basically the superior, perfected version of your fake-girl act, ain't I, Katzo-kun?

Sunraku: "Nyah-nyah, Mr. Can't-Spawn-a-Unique~"

Kyo the Ultimate: "Sunraku… -chan? Well, whatever. Some of that splash damage is headed over there."

Sunraku: "Huh?"

I look where Kyotimate’s pointing… oh my. The Schwarz Vulf folks are trembling, and not in a good way. I think for a second, then realize: all those lines I used to mess with Katzo also perfectly apply to Schwarz Vulf, who can't even manage to spawn EX scenarios, let alone beat Unique Monsters.

Sunraku: "Ah… well, I mean, y'know… soooorry☆"

Pencilgon punched me. Reason given: "Watching you do the cutesy act just pisses me off." Like my act isn't a hell of a lot milder than the thick-ass mask you wear every day!! Author’s Note: SooOOrry☆ (currently on the verge of death from crashing half-naked through a second-floor window).