Chapter 430: Dragons, O Dragons! Part Seven

Pencilgon: "As expected of the muscle madam... Once tanks are bodyguarding her, of course she becomes impossible to deal with."

Argent Owl: "Oh, Pencil. Good morning."

Pencilgon: "Your head’s being bitten, Argent Owl-chan-san?"

Argent Owl: "Ah, this much is nothing. Strength is justice!!"

With a sickening crunch, the small dragon wrenched free by grip strength alone was slammed into the ground and crushed underfoot.

A truly not-funny amount of damage effects was pouring from Argent Owl’s head, but they soon vanished as regeneration restored her. Pencilgon watched with a thoroughly put-off look, then collected herself and gave the knights behind her instructions through hand signals.

Argent Owl: "So? I’ve been wondering for a while now—what are those behind you? They don’t look like players."

Pencilgon: "Fufufu... I’m glad you asked. I’m about to show you something really fun with a bang...!"

With a broad grin, Pencilgon spun around and barked sharply at the knights.

Pencilgon: "Mandies Heavy Infantry Corps, weapons ready!!"

Mandies Heavy Infantry Corps: "YEAHHHHHH!!"

Argent Owl: "Whoa."

The knights, who had remained silent until now, suddenly let out strangely cheerful cries.

As though that had been the signal, the stems and leaves hidden beneath their helmets popped out. The fourteen knights—power-build Human Dragoras armed with Imron-brand weapons and armor—raised their weapons in unison.

Super Farmer: "Oh, nice. I don’t hate this kind of thing. Mandies Archer Corps! Bows ready!!"

Zenith Guevara: "Oh, I’m doing this too? All right, Mandies Engineer Corps, everyone get ready!"

At Super Farmer’s signal, relatively slender Human Dragoras equipped with bows and arrows moved into action. At Zenith Guevara’s signal, comparatively smaller Human Dragoras did the same.

Argent Owl: "What is this?"

Pencilgon: "Fufufu, the Moneygrubber-Farmer Brand proudly brings you its Human Dragora series this autumn! Call it a demonstration!!"

Like Conquista Dolls, Human Dragoras were something players could freely customize as they pleased.

Unlike Conquista Dolls, however, which each player could contract only one of, Human Dragoras had no such limit. A single player could even travel around with Human Dragoras until they filled the maximum party size of fifteen.

Naturally, though, there were drawbacks.

A Human Dragora’s lifespan was basically seven days. Once those seven days passed, it became an item called “[Name]’s Dormant Bulb.” Its memories as a character carried over, but its level, stats, and experience were reset.

And turning it back into a Human Dragora required a skill from the Farmer line.

Pencilgon: "This time, I pressed Super Farmer over there for a huge favor and had him be generous with us."

Super Farmer: "I made it. Aheh."

Ignoring Super Farmer’s ahegao double peace-sign appeal with practiced ease, Pencilgon continued.

Pencilgon: "Leveling them was tedious as hell, but we got through it and every one of them is level ninety-nine! Now, show them your strength!!"

Mandies: "YEAHHHHHH!!"

The next moment, a clod of earth Blockentreed had physically hurled by splitting the ground sent several Human Dragoras flying.

Pencilgon: "M-Mandy No. 6! No. 11!! Damn it, everyone charge! Our target is Blockentreed’s briars!!"

Argent Owl: "Not its head?"

Pencilgon: "No, no. Those tentacles are obviously the key to its energy supply, right? They’ll probably regenerate from the severed ends, but we can at least draw its attention. You lot, join the attack too! Zenny-kun, you know the one—let’s go with three-rank volley fire!"

Zenith Guevara: "You really work people hard... And the archer corps is over there, damn it!"

Mandies: "Charge!!"

As the group rushed in amid shouting, screaming, and cries of “yeah, yeah,” Argent Owl let out a small sigh.

Argent Owl: "Isn’t it just a little wrong to get all fired up without me!?"

Then, wearing a predatory grin, Argent Owl ran toward Blockentreed as well.

Blockentreed: "Nugoooh! Annoying!!"

Blockentreed, which looked something like an elephant tortoise, was a dragon with the high toughness its appearance suggested, along with slow but crushingly heavy attacks.

Sturdy, certainly.

And yet... defenseless.

It possessed briar tentacles as a means of intercepting close-range attackers, but their original purpose was to thrust into the ground and siphon or expel energy—not to brush off bugs.

Blockentreed: "Nnngh... Uoaaah!!"

Argent Owl: "Hey there, old fossil?"

Blockentreed: "You...!"

Blockentreed was vindictive. It never forgot an injury it had received, and it also had the nasty habit of laughing when the one responsible died.

That was why the “bug” that had punched its jaw away only moments ago was fresh in its memory. The instant Argent Owl appeared before it, all of Blockentreed’s attention turned toward her.

Pencilgon: "No. 3! Lend me your shoulder!!"

Mandy No. 3: "YEAH!!"

It was only that comparing her to a pervert who frequently ended up as a stain on a wall was unfair.

And, when one thought about it, comparing her to a pro gamer who maintained an eighty-percent win rate in official matches was unfair too.

Arthur Pencilgon was not actually bad at controlling her character.

She was originally a spear fighter, and much of her stat build had been invested in mobility. Using one Human Dragora’s back as a steppingstone, Pencilgon launched herself onto Blockentreed’s back.

Pencilgon: "Hup."

Blockentreed’s movements were slow. Yet surprisingly few people tried to climb onto and fight atop its back.

That was because its back was covered in monsters that could only be called dragonized plants, and they attacked anyone who tried.

But the dragonized plants possessed one weakness so severe it might as well have been fatal.

Pencilgon: "Hahaha, completely ignoring armor is the best!!"

With a sharp swish, Pencilgon’s spearhead effortlessly severed the stalk of a plant resembling a nastier Venus flytrap.

For plant-type monsters, part destruction effectively applied to their entire bodies. Once cut free from their stalks, they could be rendered harmless with ease.

And even a reasonably tough stalk was scarcely different from tofu before the passive complete-armor-ignore effect of Sacred Spear Caledfwlch.

Pencilgon: "Fufufu, ahahahaha! Time for some fun field-wrecking!!"

Argent Owl: "Call it harvesting."

Pencilgon: "Oh, Argent Owl-chan. You’re getting your head chewed on pretty hard. You all right?"

Argent Owl: "If you think this is enough to stop me... you are sorely mistaken!!"

Still being bitten on the head, Argent Owl seized a stalk in a fierce grip and forcibly tore it from Blockentreed’s back.

Pencilgon watched, thoroughly put off, but work was work. She quickly operated Inventoria.

Pencilgon: "Ta-da! Super Farmer-brand Hazeran Markers! Here we go!!"

They were originally items meant to be planted in soil, but Pencilgon had gambled that Blockentreed’s back—covered in dense plant growth despite being dragonized—would satisfy the conditions.

It appeared she had been right.

Pencilgon: "Come on, come on, we’re pulling out!"

Argent Owl: "What? What are you planning?"

Pencilgon: "Engineers! Hazeran Bombs, ready!!"

Marker. Bomb.

There were things one could understand from the words alone.

Argent Owl’s eyes widened at what was due to happen seconds later. She leapt from the green dragon’s back just before softball-sized “buds” thrown onto its back detonated all at once.

Blockentreed: "What is thisss!?"

Pencilgon: "All right, back cleared! Troops, let’s climb onto its back!!"

Mandies: "YEAHHHHH!!"

Players joined the Human Dragoras’ battle cries with cheers of their own.

At the sight of bug-like players swarming in with their eyes lit up, Blockentreed could only groan.

• Wondrously Strange Bulb
  A Palpunte-style item. Plant it and grow it with a Farmer-line skill, and it will develop into something.

  The most common outcome is an ingredient-type item, followed by material items usable for things such as accessories.

  Then, at roughly a thirty-percent chance, it grows into either a monster or a Human Dragora.