Chapter 390: Bakumatsu Suplex

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Even rankers, when they fall, fall in an instant. If anything, the fact that I've survived this long is the real miracle.

Sunraku: "Alright... what to do."

Even if he did splash the damage over here, thanks to the Great General of Sincerity buying time, Tousen's leg managed to recover in time. Unfortunately, my part got cleanly sliced off, so it won't be back unless I respawn. Having it cut off halfway through the upper arm throws my balance off, but well, I'll manage once I get used to it. Honestly, it's a fair bit better than getting it cut from the shoulder joint. Thanks for building up my missing-limb balance sense, deserted island. But I'm never, ever forgiving that giant-ass owl.

Still, the situation is incredibly bad. With two rankers and a title-holder divine-punished, the players in this area seem to have chosen to evacuate. I want to run too, but the rule is you can't run from the boss. And on top of that, dual-wielding was how I barely kept up, and now I'm in this state. Honestly, the chance of winning is already...

Sunraku: "...Heh."

Nah, this isn't the time for role-playing sinking into despair. There is a chance to win... It's precisely because Raid Boss-san pulled out some weird thing like the Star-Cutting Pole that I can see a path. But can I pull it off? People tend to focus only on the length, but the power of that thing is nothing any half-assed katana can compare to. Just grazing the tip sent an arm flying. I don't even need to think about what a clean hit would do.

Sunraku: "Oi, Hero! Sorry, but I'm dragging you into a short decisive battle. Bet your whole life on it!!"

Tousen: "Interesting. I'm in, heads or tails!"

Bring it on. Now that's a Bakumatsu player.

If we've come this far, the rankings don't matter anymore. If just the two of us (excluding the opening-act dropouts) can put a dent in Raid Boss-san, we'll grab a glory far more valuable than some reward that won't even stay in our hands for a single night.

Yura: "Something you want to do?"

Sunraku: "Heh, Raid Boss-san... The thing we're gonna do is just one thing, right?"

Forward. Streaming damage effects from my missing left arm, forward, forward. Somehow into the Star-Cutting Pole's range, faster than the swung declaration of death———!!

Yura: "...Fun."

That smile is, no doubt, the composure of someone watching to see what I'll do... in other words, he's messing around. But I won't get mad about it. If he's going to go easy on me, I'll make full use of it. Reach the distance where blades can touch, close even further... and from a window I'd prepped for instant deployment, I pull out a single weapon.

In that instant, the Star-Cutting Pole flashes. A wind-cutting sound, too light and smooth, closes in on my neck. The weapon I swing up would never reach Raid Boss-san’s head before that slash reaches me—but I’m not aiming for the main body. My target is the blade itself, the one about to cut me down!!

Sunraku: "You're under arrest!!"

Yura: "Wah."

The satisfying clang of metal slamming into metal. And yet, the Star-Cutting Pole doesn't move. It's not a stalemate of strength...

Yura: "A jitte."

Sunraku: "That's right, the Great Jitte, 'Great Arrest'... I've caught you, Star-Cutting Pole."

Without even needing to call out, a meeting of minds. The jitte, shaped like a digital "4," bites firmly onto the Star-Cutting Pole's blade. With a twist, I stop Raid Boss-san's movement, even if only for a moment. And without missing that instant, Tousen raises his katana and closes the distance in one breath.

Tousen: "I'll cut you down along with him!"

Sunraku: "Bring it on!"

Gh... with just one right arm, I really am losing the power struggle. But even so, I step in further and grab Raid Boss-san by the collar. This buys just enough time for the rank two to land a full-force blow.

Sunraku: "Finish it, Hero!"

Tousen: "I'll take your life..."

Sunraku & Tousen: "Divine punishment!!!"

Come to think of it, maybe it's adversity that awakens Raid Boss-san. And us, having cornered him to a good spot, basically stepped on the tiger's tail.

Yura: "So much fun. So... I won't lose."

Tousen: "Hofyuh."

Sunraku: "Hah?"

Tousen suddenly crumples. Was he cut? No. The blade didn't move. Then why? No, no, it wasn't the blade. That posture, stretching his leg high up... a high kick? The height of the foot is exactly at Tousen's avatar's... no way.

Sunraku: "You kicked him in the jaw and stunned him?"

Yura: "Fun, fun... So, I won't lose."

Don't be ridiculous. This game does have a Stun status effect, but... it's not something you trigger with punches and kicks. It takes an impact like getting kicked by a horse... No, wait. Could he have met the condition by violently shaking only the head in a single instant?

Sunraku: "R-Raid Boss...!!"

As if to say he's having so much fun right now he can't help himself, Raid Boss-san's cheeks curl upward. In an instant, he circles behind my back and clings tightly to my waist. Before I can even resist, a floating sensation. He doesn't just lift me up, but falls straight backwards... this is, no way, stop... ah.

Yura: "Divine punishment."

???: "Back..."

???: "...drop..."

BOGYON! The closest comparison... what would it be? Smashing a watermelon into another watermelon and having them destroy each other...

Sunraku & Tousen: "Pgyuru!?"

If anything, since he grabbed me around the waist, was that a German suplex? No—he twisted his body so my head and Tousen's would smash together... If I had to name it, a Bakumatsu Suplex?

Whatever the move was called, neither Tousen nor I had time to respond to the sudden grapple before we were driven into the mat.

The game does have the Stun status effect, but apparently it doesn't knock out your logged-in consciousness itself. Honestly, this feels closer to Paralysis.

???: "Y-you bastard..."

Yura: "Your death poem."

Tousen: "Next time, I'll win... Wash your neck and wait..."

Sunraku: "The real fight's after the event, Yura-kun..."

Huh? Wait, a thrust? It's a thrust? Wait, the head? Huh, wha—time to brace myself—

Sunraku: "Gweh."

Skewered together with Tousen, my event has just ended.

Sunraku: "Ah! Seniors who died before me, what's uuup!"

???: "Do you have some kind of disease where you can’t live without provoking someone?"

Shut up. Getting done in by Raid Boss-san scattered all the event weapons I'd collected, so I'm a little grumpy. Though, I don't carry every single event weapon around every time, so it's only a portion of what I had on hand, but still.

???: "We did get to a good spot, though... Think we could’ve won with two more people?"

???: "Who knows... wouldn’t they have just been divine-punished before you got to that situation? The basic tactic against Raid Boss-san is overwhelming by numbers, y’know?"

???: "What, like honeybees?"

???: "Even if you line up and attack, you just get cut down in an assembly line..."

Having now officially joined the ranks of the dead, I'm noisily chatting with the guys who died first when I notice Raid Boss-san looking this way. Yeaaah! All the ghosts here... wait, aren't there like a hundred people here now? When I wave along with the entire crowd of ghosts packed in tight, Raid Boss-san nods once, then sprints off with the Star-Cutting Pole.

???: "What’s up with him?"

???: "Did his hype just go up and now he’s planning to wipe out the survivors...?"

Ah.

The dead cannot touch the living, nor can they convey words... So all we could do was simply watch over the remaining survivors as they were trampled by Raid Boss-san, rampaging like a demon god...

???: "Still got manju?"

???: "Honestly, this water tastes weird, but man, the sake’s going down smooth."

???: "Whoa, awesome. He took him out through the wall."

Honestly, it was fun as hell.